I'm Enjoying Not Being Pregnant.

There. I said it. I know I broke every IF rule there is, but it's true.

That's not to say that I don't ever want to BE pregnant or that I don't wish that I were still were pregnant on a daily basis (I'd be in the 2nd trimester now, well, or 38 weeks, or well, 30 weeks, depending on which pregnancy you use). I'm not on edge every. second. of. the. day. I'm not a wreck every time I breathe. I don't panic over every ingredient in everything I ingest. I don't inspect/smoosh my boobs to check to see if they still hurt. I can go to the bathroom in peace and don't have to analyze TP every time I go to the bathroom (including trying to check internally for spotting when I go to the bathroom). I can enjoy sex with my husband and not worry pretty much lay there like a frozen person.

This, of course, is the calm before the storm. Before all the testing. Before my appointment that I made with the hematologist. Before trying again and all that goes with it. Heck, this 3rd pg I wasn't even sure I wanted to try again so soon. It was our 3rd cycle after our 2nd loss and we figured sure, let's see what happens? What are the odds? That's obvious now I suppose.

I'm going to enjoy this as much as I can until next Tuesday, which is my first appointment.