Thursday, May 20, 2010

Today is the Day

That I'm supposed to be giving birth to a sweet, baby girl.

I had a dream about her while I was pregnant with her. We were having a picnic in the yard, with a blanket spread out under us and with my dogs on either side. She had beautiful wavy, dark brown hair and the most beautiful big blue eyes, just like her daddy's.

My heart aches for you. How can I miss something so much that was never meant to be?

Not a day goes by that I don't think about what could have been.

What should have been.
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24 comments:

  1. Mrs.JoynerMay 20, 2010 at 6:48 AM

    Kelly..my heart aches for you..Im so angry for everything you've had to endure, and so amazed at your strength..

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  2. cdgMay 20, 2010 at 7:48 AM

    I am thinking of you today as you remember your sweet baby girl. This is certainly a day filled with "should have beens". Sending love and peace your way.

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  3. Secret SloperMay 20, 2010 at 8:29 AM

    I'm so sorry. Thinking of you today.

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  4. KansasMay 20, 2010 at 9:10 AM

    I found your blog from another one that I read. After reading through your blog, I'm just heartbroken for everything you've been though.
    I know how hard estimated due dates are. Be gentle with yourself today and all week for that matter. (((hugs)))

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  5. LisaMay 20, 2010 at 9:32 AM

    May 2 was my due date for my 3rd pregnancy... so i think i understand what you're going through today. a friend told me i shouldn't "remember" these dates - she couldn't understand why i would want to torture myself. i told her it wasn't a "choice" to remember. this friend never suffered with infertility (obviously...) take care of yourself today and know that i'm thinking of you and sending you hugs.

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  6. BrittMay 20, 2010 at 9:38 AM

    My heart just breaks for you today. Please know that I am praying for you today!

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  7. AnonymousMay 20, 2010 at 9:49 AM

    Love you, Kelly. (((hugs)))

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  8. TammyMay 20, 2010 at 9:59 AM

    THinking of you...

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  9. AnotherDreamerMay 20, 2010 at 10:07 AM

    (*hugs*) Thinking of you- so sorry.

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  10. AnonymousMay 20, 2010 at 10:12 AM

    I'm saying prayers for you today Kelly. ((hugs))

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  11. RDMay 20, 2010 at 10:20 AM

    (((HUGS))), Kelly. I'm thinking of you today.

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  12. RebeccaMay 20, 2010 at 10:24 AM

    I'm thinking about you today, Kelly ((hugs))

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  13. AlexMay 20, 2010 at 10:27 AM

    Oh I'm so very sorry. Thinking of you...

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  14. AnonymousMay 20, 2010 at 10:55 AM

    You will be in my thoughts and prayers today hon. Hugs.

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  15. Basic GirlMay 20, 2010 at 2:08 PM

    Thinking of you today. (((HUGS)))

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  16. MichelleMay 20, 2010 at 2:48 PM

    Kelly - Thinking of you today. Do whatever makes you feel ok today.

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  17. Glass Case of EmotionMay 20, 2010 at 5:11 PM

    Thinking of you.

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  18. JoMay 20, 2010 at 5:17 PM

    Thinking of you today, and every day. And thinking about your precious daughter, too. There are no words that can ease the pain you feel right now -- I know that. But I'm here for you anyway.

    Hugs,
    Jo

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  19. myinfertilitywoesMay 20, 2010 at 5:21 PM

    (((hugs))) to you - big humungous ones. I wish I could help in taking the pain away. Thinking of you...

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  20. AnonymousMay 20, 2010 at 5:59 PM

    Awe, I'm so sorry Kelly. Thinking of you. =(

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  21. AnonymousMay 20, 2010 at 7:47 PM

    Thinking of you and sending you tons of love.

    (((hugs)))

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  22. AnonymousMay 21, 2010 at 1:59 AM

    ((HUGS)) I'm terrified of 16 June when my son should have been born. Nothing I can say makes bit better, but I understand.

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  23. JackieMacMay 21, 2010 at 11:05 AM

    I am so very sorry for your loss (((HUGS)) I know today has to be one of the hardest days - I am dreading my due date in July. Thinking of you

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  24. BethMay 23, 2010 at 1:49 PM

    It's not fair. I wish your baby was there with you.

    xx

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